Such a conundrum that has presented itself....so much a conundrum to drag me out of my Blog reclusiveness.....
DJ did so well last semester: happy in the community college, found herself a sweetheart, wrote a helluva paper in defense of gay marriage and then had another set back. We're rebounding now-much quicker than last time but it's not easy. She is SUCH a teenager and in many ways, we've noticed a slight regression. It's almost like she's trying to make up for lost time-can ya blamer her? We can't.
Then, out of the blue, I get contacted by an organization interested in talking to us about our parenting. Of course, being Bulldog's beloved, my hackles stand up initially. But, I did a snippet of research and it seems legitimate, this organization dedicated to telling others' stories in a respectable manner. Do we share to encourage others, even if it may make DJ more identifiable, somehow, to someone who wants to know about her previous life?
I read a book recently: Far from the tree by Andrew Solomon. Brave folks shared their gut-wrenching stories and it opened my eyes. Do we owe that to others? It's certainly worth thinking about....
DJ did so well last semester: happy in the community college, found herself a sweetheart, wrote a helluva paper in defense of gay marriage and then had another set back. We're rebounding now-much quicker than last time but it's not easy. She is SUCH a teenager and in many ways, we've noticed a slight regression. It's almost like she's trying to make up for lost time-can ya blamer her? We can't.
Then, out of the blue, I get contacted by an organization interested in talking to us about our parenting. Of course, being Bulldog's beloved, my hackles stand up initially. But, I did a snippet of research and it seems legitimate, this organization dedicated to telling others' stories in a respectable manner. Do we share to encourage others, even if it may make DJ more identifiable, somehow, to someone who wants to know about her previous life?
I read a book recently: Far from the tree by Andrew Solomon. Brave folks shared their gut-wrenching stories and it opened my eyes. Do we owe that to others? It's certainly worth thinking about....
I certainly found stories of others successfully managing transition hugely helpful and also incredibly moving. For me they brought me both and courage. From an altruistic point of view I am sure that your readers would be grateful but its a big step to throw off some of the anonymity.
ReplyDeleteNice to hear DJ is doing well, despite the occasional set back. Lovely to hear from you
Owe?.... owe who?
ReplyDeleteall the trans people who were there to hold your hand as DJ went into the OR? the ones who were there to help when things went badly during her recovery? the ones who helped pay for her treatments? and supported you and her through her treatment for self harm and her eating disorders?
Please be careful! and don't forget the bad times and what caused them.
I can understand your desire to help other parents in the position you were in, but those who need help and whom you CAN actually help will seek YOU out and can be corresponded with privately
once the genie is out of the bottle in the information technology age.....
I hope that you and yours are well.
http://0rthodoxtranssexual.wordpress.com/2013/03/10/the-hard-stuff/
ReplyDeleteDo not do it.
ReplyDeleteLiz
Being a trans* man I know how it feels to not want to put yourself or your family in the spot light like that. I am the President of PFLAG Tri-Cities (www.pflagtricities.org) and I am outted quite frequently by typically well meaning people. It can be frustrating and extremely disphoric and times. I would say, talk to your daughter about how she feels about it. Maybe even talk to her therapist. Voice your concerns. In the end I'd let DJ decide.
ReplyDelete