Tuesday, August 18, 2015

(Perhaps I need to) Give Cait a chance!!

Ok-so I continued to binge- watch I am Cait, and I'm so glad I did. I felt like what the viewer saw was far more "real" than the Versace handbag discussion earlier in the evening.

Cait met with some other women who were all were transgender. The mentoring that most of the women engaged in was so important. If only all women did this for each other!! There were two women who talked about a "pink haze" (I think that was the phrase they used) to which I could relate.  I remember DJ going through such a phase that I attributed to adolescence and joy at being able to be who she really was. http://transitioningfamily.blogspot.com/2011/08/fashion-sense.html
But these women seemed to cast it in a different light-not better, not worse, just different than the perspective I had. (Rachel-my filter obscured my ability to have a global perspective again!)  What I recall was DJ expecting us to absorb, accept, and acclimate to her reality IMMEDIATELY!!  I understood that her reality had been just that for her entire life, but her reality was new to us.  It wasn't that we didn't want to absorb, accept and acclimate quickly, we just didn't know how, right away.  We had to remind her of that from time to time.  So, if I could give the Kardashians and Cait any advice it would be:  be patient with each other.  Be honest enough to say that you are trying to accept each other, but that it's a work in progress.

From an outsider's perspective, Cait's falling out with her former wife is completely understandable from both sides:  Cait wanted Kris to accept her as her wife; Kris wanted her husband. The inevitable mistakes made along the way that will occur when one or both have to let go of what they thought was their reality must be viewed as only that-inevitable missteps that occur from learning to navigate a new course. 

Hopefully people at large who happen to watch I am Cait will see the similarities between families with transgender members and families that don't have any transgender members.  The underlying issue is essentially the same:  struggle to accept each other, struggle to compromise, and struggle to identify what is MOST important and finally, the struggle to let go of what we cannot have, achieve or control while simultaneously striving for what we can have, achieve and control.

I will continue to tune in...