Another "goodie" that I somehow forgot to publish a few years ago. Rebel Teacher is the bomb. Parents-this was eye opening for me, hearing Rebel Teacher's perspective; perhaps it will be for you, as well.
The Author
During my meltdown yesterday, when I was finally able to get to the sad part and boo-hoo a bit, I decided to NOT drive my car and instead, turn around and go see a friend in lieu of trying to make it to the hair salon. This friend lives right up the street and actually is person who came up with my sister's name that I use in this blog - "Bean." It's short for lesbian. She and her husband were my sister's neighbors and referred to my sister and her girlfriend, who we'll call "Saint" because 1) she lives with my sister and 2) it's a tongue in cheek reference to the fact that she was raised in the Catholic faith and her parents feared for her soul on finding out about her orientation, as The Beans. These folks are liberal minded, accepting and have hilarious senses of humor.
So, I stopped by to see this friend and I was so glad I did. I've found that I am getting the most amazing insight from people and I did from her yesterday, as well. Now, we'll call this woman Rebel Teacher because 1) she's a rebel and 2) she teaches, and loves to teach, the kids who most others think of as the rebels. She sincerely loves the kids who are on the fringes of acceptance, and her experience is valuable. She said to me, "It was just too easy at first, wasn't it? DJ probably thought the hardest part would be telling you and Bulldog and the rest would be easy. She figured her friends would be more accepting. And then when you and Bulldog took it in stride, and she found out her friends wouldn't accept, it must have felt terrible for her."
I never thought about it like that. DJ had such huge faith in her friends, and naturally, because she's a teenager, so little faith in us. Once she had our acceptance, she probably figured school would be a piece of cake.
Then, Rebel Teacher added, "Being invisible is worse. She was probably ready for someone saying something ugly. She could respond to that." Or, as Bulldog put it, "You can't fight back if you're not even there."
Sometimes I'm perceptive as hell, and other times, I'm as clueless as a box of rocks. I knew being invisible was terrible, but now I understand it in another way-DJ was prepared to stand up for herself. She wasn't prepared for.....nothing.
DJ hasn't said any of this to us, so we could be off base, but sometimes when I share insights from others, I can see a light of recognition go on in her face. It's as if the thoughts are floating around in her head, but it's hard to explain until she hears someone else's perspective and then she either says, "No, that's not it" or "Yeah, it's kind of like that."
THIS is why we have to help each other. Isn't it amazing how the smallest act of sharing can help another person so much?
There's this awesome woman in Australia who has been corresponding with me. She has given me so much insight and reminders about what is and isn't important. Her stories are a reminder of the importance of perspective. Small people are just that-SMALL. We cannot let them become so large in our lives that they throw us of off our own tracks. And one of the best ways to keep that from happening is talking about how we feel, and listening to others who are willing to share their stories and thoughts with us.
The Author
During my meltdown yesterday, when I was finally able to get to the sad part and boo-hoo a bit, I decided to NOT drive my car and instead, turn around and go see a friend in lieu of trying to make it to the hair salon. This friend lives right up the street and actually is person who came up with my sister's name that I use in this blog - "Bean." It's short for lesbian. She and her husband were my sister's neighbors and referred to my sister and her girlfriend, who we'll call "Saint" because 1) she lives with my sister and 2) it's a tongue in cheek reference to the fact that she was raised in the Catholic faith and her parents feared for her soul on finding out about her orientation, as The Beans. These folks are liberal minded, accepting and have hilarious senses of humor.
So, I stopped by to see this friend and I was so glad I did. I've found that I am getting the most amazing insight from people and I did from her yesterday, as well. Now, we'll call this woman Rebel Teacher because 1) she's a rebel and 2) she teaches, and loves to teach, the kids who most others think of as the rebels. She sincerely loves the kids who are on the fringes of acceptance, and her experience is valuable. She said to me, "It was just too easy at first, wasn't it? DJ probably thought the hardest part would be telling you and Bulldog and the rest would be easy. She figured her friends would be more accepting. And then when you and Bulldog took it in stride, and she found out her friends wouldn't accept, it must have felt terrible for her."
I never thought about it like that. DJ had such huge faith in her friends, and naturally, because she's a teenager, so little faith in us. Once she had our acceptance, she probably figured school would be a piece of cake.
Then, Rebel Teacher added, "Being invisible is worse. She was probably ready for someone saying something ugly. She could respond to that." Or, as Bulldog put it, "You can't fight back if you're not even there."
Sometimes I'm perceptive as hell, and other times, I'm as clueless as a box of rocks. I knew being invisible was terrible, but now I understand it in another way-DJ was prepared to stand up for herself. She wasn't prepared for.....nothing.
DJ hasn't said any of this to us, so we could be off base, but sometimes when I share insights from others, I can see a light of recognition go on in her face. It's as if the thoughts are floating around in her head, but it's hard to explain until she hears someone else's perspective and then she either says, "No, that's not it" or "Yeah, it's kind of like that."
THIS is why we have to help each other. Isn't it amazing how the smallest act of sharing can help another person so much?
There's this awesome woman in Australia who has been corresponding with me. She has given me so much insight and reminders about what is and isn't important. Her stories are a reminder of the importance of perspective. Small people are just that-SMALL. We cannot let them become so large in our lives that they throw us of off our own tracks. And one of the best ways to keep that from happening is talking about how we feel, and listening to others who are willing to share their stories and thoughts with us.
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